2Tone Vegas Trip Report #18 - CES/AVN, low poker content, porn stars, low-rez pics

[2Tone]

Two Vegas trips in two months in one too many. But CES came just 30 days after the Vegas marathon, and with work covering my expenses, I was back on a plane to Vegas.

I flew down Thursday night, arriving around 7 p.m. Since I didn’t get the green light from my company for the trip until pretty late, I was stuck on Southwest Airlines, and staying (again) at the Imperial Palace, way overpaying for both. And, this being a business trip, I was without my crew of friends.

On the way to dinner I swung by the Bellagio poker room, which was busy, though Bobby’s Room was empty. I ate at the Bellagio buffet, which, as always, was good, if pricey. Some of the seafood was a little dry, but I can’t complain about unlimited and very tasty tiramisu.

After dinner I set out in search of a limit game. None to be found on a Thursday night at Caesars. None to be found at Bally’s. The consensus is that any Vegas 1/2 NL game is soft, and it’s pretty sad that I’m not confident enough in my NL cash game to play. But past experience shows that soft as they may be, they are not soft enough for me. If I can’t find limit, I’m going to punch my own weight at the .50/$1 game at Bill’s. Now this one I can beat, and won a small amount simply by playing as straight forward as possible.

I had to be up early for conferences on Friday. And by now I have my up-early the next day Vegas routine down, and it involves supporting some of the very same hard-working ladies I had seen on my last trip. It is my pleasure to be contributing to the Vegas economic comeback, one cold domestic light beer and lap dance at a time.

Friday was spent most spent in conferences, with limited time to walk the floor. While the most weren’t anything all that exciting to anyone not in the field, I did attend a one amazing session about “the artist as an entrepreneur,” with panelists including Damon Lindelof and Carlton Cuse , executive producers and writers of “Lost,” and Shawn Ryan, creator and writer of “The Shield.” For my money these are two of the best written shows ever to air on television, and it was fascinating to listen to them describe the process. Afterwards, I got a couple minutes to chat one-on-one with both Lindelof and Ryan, which for a media geek like me was pretty thrilling. Lindelof joked about the famous “Lost numbers” showing up the recent mega Megamillions drawing. I was amused/surprised to see how much Ryan resembles Michael Chiklis/Vic Mackey.

After a long day of sessions on Friday, I treated myself to shave at the Art of Shaving in Mandalay Bay. I’d never had a straight razor shave before. While they bill it as very soothing/relaxing, I wasn’t able to really relax until after the blade was away from my neck. Still, all in all, it was a very pleasant indulgence, and I was pleased with the end result. To borrow a Ludacris phrase I’m “half man and half gorilla,” walking around with a 5:00 shadow by half past three. I hadn’t had my face that smooth since I was 11.

Friday night I checked out the Cosmopolitan, the newest hotel in Vegas. It’s a large, elegant space, full of high-end shops, restaurants, and a hot new nightclub. Their buffet was cheaper and better than the Bellagio, offering small plates of all kinds of great stuff.

I wandered over to the Mirage, which was spreading a surprisingly tight $3/$6 game, but I was able to eke out a small win. Around 10:30, I got in line for Jet, armed with a free pass. A half hour later I was in, and had a surprisingly good time, dancing to a good set of house and hip-hop, amidst an upbeat, friendly crowd of all types.

Saturday I had more time to walk the floor. Among the coolest stuff …

A treadmill with a large video screen hooked up to Google Maps, so you can virtually run anywhere in the world. The machine actually measures your pace/distance and display progress accordingly, so for example, it would be the correct number of miles around Central Park.

A printer that makes three dimensional renderings of any images in surprisingly good detail.

Alpline ski goggles with a built-in digital GPS display in the field of vision, including altitude and other measurements.

A 65” touch screen monitor.

Wireless power, used to light up cereal boxes on store shelf, run a blender from a kitchen counter, etc.

A number of cool solar applications, including a solar powered Iphone speaker/charging system.

And of course everyone had a tablet – there must have been a dozen varieties of them. The only one I really liked was from Samsung, and won’t be available for another six months – it has a full keyboard that slides out, and runs Windows 7, including Office – it was the only one I saw that I could see fully replacing a laptop.

Meanwhile, avoid buying a 3D-TV that needs glasses – they aren’t fully there with the no-glasses required models, but they were looking pretty good. Fuji had a camera that takes 3D pictures, which were gimmicky but cool.

[2Tone]

After fighting my way back to strip amongst 120k other convention goers, I had dinner at the Hash House A Go-Go, which has been featured on the Man vs. Food. The guy a few tables down ordered the pancakes, which were ridiculous – Frisbee sized at the smallest. I went for the Boston Hash, which came with eggs and an oversized crab cake. Good food, and a fun novelty place, but there’s just no need for portion sizes that large.

After that I returned to Mirage, where I ran badly for the first time in the trip, and dropped a rack at $3/$6, most of it when I my one-card King high flush lost to an Ace High flush. I had three bet the river, and he made it four bets, which was a pretty indication that I had the second best hand in the biggest pot of my trip.

Speaking of racks … There were any number of poker rooms I could have tried to recover my losses. I chose the Palms, where it just so happened the Adult Video News awards was taking place. The red carpet was a crazy scene, with professional and amateur photographers throwing elbows for position to take the best shots of porn stars wearing the kind of gowns you don’t see at the Oscars.

Eventually the circus made its way into the auditorium, and I recouped a few dollars in $3/$6 kill game. From there it was across the street to the Rio to check out the new Crown nightclub. The line was massive, and the crowd – young, about 90% black, dressed in street wear – was boisterous, with a fight nearly breaking out before I even got inside. I actually prefer clubs with an edge as opposed to the Trysts/Pure/LAX variety where the girls dance in circles by themselves to house remixes of the top 40 hits. But this place was ghetto. Faced with a line for the men’s room, one patron whips it out and pissed in the hallway. And on the dance floor, the vibe I was getting was that old white guy was in the wrong place. I split soon after.

Back at CES on Sunday morning to wrap up. After writing last year that the porn convention/expo was to skeezy even for me, how did I end up back there? I’ll chalk it up a cheap ticket, late flight and a lack of good judgment.

But, hey, if you are looking to witness a live rim job take place inches from about 25 cell phone cameras manned by heavy breathers, it’s just the place!

It’ll be a while before I’m back in town – time for some wholesome family time to balance out recent activities.

As usual, my pics are terrible. I really need to start bringing down a decent digital camera rather than relying on my Iphone.

[Talking Poker]

Finally made time to read this... awesome trip report, as always.

Sick brag about meeting the Lost and Shield guys... And I've never had a straight razor shave, but you've made me want one.