Really Funny Pokerstar email

[Spuddy]

Hi! I am just posting an email my friend sent me in regards to Pokerstars! I got a great chuckle out of it and I thought you might too!

Spud






>----- Original Message -----
>From: MY FRIEND- EMAIL blocked for Private reasons
>Sent: 2006/03/24 21:15:11
>To:
>Subject: bad beats



Hello,


It has been about one week since my last SnG win, because of 2, 3, 4, and
5 outers knocking me out at the worst possible times. If it isn't too
much to ask, could you ease up on the bad beats for a couple of days?

Thank you!!

Matt.




--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "PokerStars Support" <support@pokerstars.com>
To: MY FRIEND-EMAIL BLOCKED for private reasons
Subject: RE: bad beats
Date: Fri, 24 Mar 2006 23:04:40 -0500

Hello Matt,

Thank you for your e-mail.

I can certainly understand the frustration that a player feels when they
suffer through bad beats, as this is something that all players must face
at one time or another. However, there are a few issues that we must delve
deeper into to gain the proper perspective on the matter, and see the
correlation between the online world and the 'real' world casino or even
the home game.

One thing that may help you gain this perspective is that we deal many
more hands than "brick and mortar" casinos. We have many more tables, and
each table is, of course, 2-4 times faster than a live game.

A typical casino poker table deals 20-30 hands per hour, while ours
deal 60, 80, and even 100 or more. (Have a look at the H/hr -- hands
per hour -- column in the real money lobby.) If you're used to casino
play, it's natural to need to adjust to the pace of playing online.
Almost everyone finds it somewhat surreal at first.

We currently deal over ten million hands *every single day*. This is
many hands than would be dealt in the large Los Angeles card casinos
(such as the Commerce and Bicycle clubs) in four *months*.

This means that we'll deal many months worth of bad beats, months
worth of straight flushes, months worth of unbelieveable hands (such
as "set over set over set"), all in one day. Quads losing to quads in
holdem is an over 5-million-to-1 occurence, which you will probably
not see in a lifetime of casino play, but it happens to someone on
PokerStars every day. Perhaps this will give you some perspective on
why things seem "different" here than in a live casino -- we've
effectively sped up time.

The best example of this is the royal flush. I have been an avid poker
player for well over a decade and I have never been dealt this hand, nor
have I been on a table when this hand has been produced. In relation, we
deal in the neighbourhood of one hundred royal flushes every day and a
couple of hundred straight flushes of a lower rank. The correlation here
is that my decade plus of hands played equals out to roughly an hours
worth of hands that are dealt on Pokerstars each hour of every day.

The second issue that we must look at is the matter of the shuffle, as
this is what causes the cards to 'fall' as they do.

Our shuffle is completely random, favoring or disfavoring no player
over any other. The computerized methods we use to shuffle the deck
are more than sufficient to ensure complete randomization of the
cards, and complete unpredictability of the cards to come. You can
see the description of these methods at:



In addition, we track all hands dealt daily to see if there is any
statistically significant variance.

In fact, we gave the source code to two independent auditors who
reviewed our shuffle algorithm and found it sound and random. You may
read the analyses of these auditors at:



We have dealt over 4,000,000,000 hands, and have freely given out real
money hand histories any time somebody has requested them. Not once
has anybody found any indication that our shuffle is not 100% random,
and many who have undertaken such studies have posted their findings
to the Internet. You may find just two of them here:




As you can see in the links provided above, we have been taken to task on
this very matter from time to time by third party auditors with expertise
in Random Number Generation. The results of these audits have always been
the same, we are 100% random in our shuffle and legitimate in every way
possible.

I would be happy to supply you with the history of every hand that you
have played on this site for your perusal or for you to put them to an
audit by a third party, is that is something that would interest you.

I have taken the liberty of doing a small audit of your play and pot
results over the last month, with the perameters being when you were dealt
pocket AA or KK. The results are listed below:


Hand# Date H/C Pot Win

4089348136 2/25/2006 AhAc Y
4089706656 2/25/2006 AhAd Y
4101014476 2/26/2006 KsKd
4101295933 2/26/2006 KdKs Y
4105614255 2/26/2006 AsAd Y
4105907164 2/26/2006 KsKh Y
4105924524 2/26/2006 AsAh Y
4105952749 2/26/2006 KsKh Y
4106078052 2/26/2006 AsAh Y
4108121367 2/26/2006 AcAs Y
4108145241 2/26/2006 KcKh Y
4108421319 2/26/2006 KhKc Y
4108538299 2/26/2006 KsKc Y
4108575593 2/26/2006 KhKc Y
4111309287 2/26/2006 AdAh Y
4111333625 2/26/2006 AdAc Y
4111471319 2/26/2006 AdAh Y
4112257328 2/26/2006 KsKc Y
4112358457 2/26/2006 KsKh Y
4119655958 2/27/2006 AhAs Y
4119866111 2/27/2006 AsAd Y
4119913619 2/27/2006 KhKc Y
4120607107 2/27/2006 KdKh Y
4135057911 2/28/2006 AsAd Y
4151418667 3/2/2006 KsKh Y
4156309276 3/2/2006 KsKd Y
4156693600 3/2/20 06 KdKc Y
4156992074 3/3/2006 KhKc Y
4165157852 3/3/2006 KdKc
4166152031 3/3/2006 AhAc Y
4172157028 3/4/2006 AcAd
4172771153 3/4/2006 KdKs Y
4173488924 3/4/2006 KhKc Y
4174865902 3/4/2006 AcAh Y
4175063918 3/4/2006 KcKh
4179186570 3/4/2006 AhAd Y
4179272035 3/4/2006 KdKs
4179389159 3/4/2006 KcKs Y
4179837833 3/5/2006 AdAh Y
4184163681 3/5/2006 AdAh Y
4184657408 3/5/2006 AdAh
4185383309 3/5/2006 KhKd Y
4185945097 3/5/2006 AsAh Y
4186078343 3/5/2006 KsKd Y
4211573491 3/7/2006 KsKh Y
4212409589 3/7/2006 AsAh Y
4212706191 3/7/2006 AsAh Y
4218614253 3/8/2006 KdKh Y
4219136039 3/8/2006 KdKc Y
4219182458 3/8/2006 AcAh Y
4220548060 3/8/2006 KcKd
4229891454 3/9/2006 KcKs
4235152149 3/9/2006 KcKd Y
4239377650 3/10/2006 AsAc Y
4239640774 3/10/2006 ; ;AdAh Y
4258583684 3/12/2006 KdKs Y
4263430045 3/12/2006 AhAs Y
4264446706 3/12/2006 AdAs Y
4264866119 3/12/2006 AdAs Y
4264925988 3/12/2006 AsAc Y
4265023620 3/12/2006 KsKc Y
4265038137 3/12/2006 KhKs Y
4274743229 3/13/2006 KhKs
4274967315 3/13/2006 AdAc
4281457194 3/13/2006 KhKc Y
4286606081 3/14/2006 KcKh Y
4286833559 3/14/2006 AhAs Y
4309462935 3/16/2006 KhKd Y
4309506171 3/16/2006 KhKc Y
4309645170 3/16/2006 KhKs Y
4309647885 3/16/2006 AcAd Y
4315716082 3/17/2006 KdKh
4325374680 3/18/2006 KsKc Y
4325716017 3/18/2006 KcKs
4326135768 3/18/2006 KcKs
4336095356 3/18/2006 KsKd
4400286298 3/24/2006 KcKs Y
4400606170 3/24/2006 KsKh Y
4401237517 3/24/2006 KdKc Y
4401563887 3/24/2006 KdKh
Total å = 80 65 (81.3%)

As you can see in the above report you are winning over 81% of the pots
with these cards, which is a very good percentage even with
these 'monster' hands, as the mathematical odds drop considerably when a
flop is seen and they drop in a more extreme manner if there is a turn and
river, as there was in the majority of these hands.

I hope that this reply has given you a different perspective on the matter
and has given you a greater sense of comfort on the issue.

You are a very valued client and in saying that, please, do not hesitate
to contact us with any other issues regarding this or any other item of
interest.

Regards,

Rob M
PokerStars Support Team